Truffle-Hunting Pig Review

Living as close to Lexington, NC as I do, pigs tend to get a bit nervous when they enter the region.  (For those of you who do not know, Lexington is considered one of the barbecue capitals of the world specifically for their pork.)  So I was a little surprised to find a pig with a nametag collar sitting at my front door this morning, staring up at me from the welcome mat.  A note attached to the collar indicated that this swine (whose name is Chauvin) was a specially bred truffle-hunting pig, trained by none other than the world-famous French hogmaster, Peurkeigh Piggh.  He asked me to review his swine's abilities, and I was only happy to oblige -- after all, truffles can go for up to $500 a pound!

Truffle-Hunting Pig

Pros:
-Very well-mannered pig -- wipes feet before entering home.
-No instruction manual needed; neither battery nor assembly required.
-Performs task of truffle-hunting as advertised... kind of.  (See "Cons.")

Cons:
-Chauvin did indeed lead me to truffles.  However, I remain unsure of whether or not this type of fungus even grows in my region of North America because when I told her I wanted some truffles Chauvin hopped on my computer, did a Google Maps search, and then dragged me down the street to the closest Godiva Chocolatier -- whereupon she broke through the glass case and ate the store's entire stock of sweets.  The manager was not amused.

Verdict:
Truffle-hunting pigs in their natural French environment may be revenue-generating investments, but in metropolitan America they are a hazard to your wallet.  However, I rate this pig three squeals out of five because she did have one redeeming quality: she makes a very tasty barbecue sandwich.